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Beginning your ADOH training journey

Curious about ADOH's facilitator training application criteria?

ADOH’s training experience is designed for those who are at least one-year post-discovery or disclosure, have moved forward in their recovery while working with a therapist or counselor, coach or mentor, and participated in a support group. Through their recovery work, they understand what a trigger is and what to do if triggered.  After receiving help they feel ready to facilitate a partner's group. And yet, keeping "Do no harm" in mind, they recognize the necessity of training.


As you can see through ADOH alumni comments and the session content  below, the training experience covers the essential skills, knowledge, and practices critical for facilitating betrayed partner groups. Grounded in peer facilitator training standards, the ADOH workbook and training experience integrates the Association of Partners Sexual Addiction Trauma Specialists (APSATS) Multidimensional Partner Trauma (MPT) Model and a Christian worldview through a trauma-informed approach.

What students say you'll learn...

Esther Kifer Elmer, who completed the first ADOH training in 2016, said, "You will learn how to be trauma-informed and trauma-sensitive, to view people’s reactions and coping as often an indicator of their underlying pain and need for safety, and that you both need and will want a tribe of women, like the ones you go through a group with, by your side as you continue to go forward! Esther leads groups for women who experienced relational trauma through their partners sexual betrayal with porn or sex addiction, or abandonment, deception, abuse, or divorce. You can find out more about her work here: True North Coaching

As a professional coach Melissa Raj describes learning about "the unique privilege of facilitating peer support groups and immense value of understanding community and how that foundation led to understanding appropriate tools, methods and techniques support group dynamics. remain standing alongside of wounded others with honor and respect not just for their journey, but also for your own ongoing journey. Melissa is a co-facilitator with Living Truth's "Women In The Battle" faith-based groups.You can learn more about Melissa's work here: Pierce The Sky Coaching


Bretta Rogers’ says "You will learn to feel comfortable feeling uncomfortable… and feeling uncomfortable is okay! There is wisdom in the group and everyone can contribute so you don’t have to know everything about all of the things in the Betrayal Trauma world.” Bretta is on the Sarah Society’s Leadership Team and is a “Newcomer Meeting Host”. Sarah Society is a free peer led support group of over 400 women, offering peer-led support via online meetings, resource sharing, and selective communication channels that provide confidentiality and choice for all who participate.

Machelle Baker Wall shares, "You will learn what it takes to create safety in a group for those who’ve experienced sexual betrayal, the importance of internal and external self-awareness, remaining curious, that groups belong to everyone in the group… and so much more! Machelle’s co-facilitated Pure Desire’s curriculum based groups and now she and her husband are launching Recovery2Restoration Coaching and Mentoring - a ministry to heal the brokenness and trauma experienced as a result of sex addiction.

A Door of Hope Betrayed Partner Peer Facilitator Training

Using a betrayal trauma approach throughout the training experience

By definition, betrayal trauma is a post traumatic stress response to wounds of deception within a committed romantic relationship. Beth Wilson (LICSW, CSAT, CCPSAs) explains her approach in her sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery work: "As defined by Association of Partners of Sex Addict Trauma Specialists (APSATS) “MPTM does not conceptualize partner trauma as someone with own disease of co-addiction but as someone who has experienced significant wounding in response to sex addiction induced trauma. Sex addiction induced trauma destroys relational trust and the partners own ability to trust themselves. Research has also shown that partners not only experience betrayal trauma but often show signs of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). We now know that sex addiction and trauma changes the brain wiring. Trauma increases the need for comfort and attachment. All that is lost at the time of discovery of the betrayal trauma.”

Session One: The Trauma Informed Partner Peer Facilitator Principles of trauma-informed care, types of trauma, definition of the partner betrayal trauma and sexual addiction (SA) problematic sexual behaviors (PSB), and the importance of grounding exercises and self-care.

Session Two: The Way Out is Through How trauma (as an existential crisis) impact faith/beliefs, the stages in the life-of-faith perspective helps prepare and normalize a crisis of faith experience, and precipitating factors leading to spiritual distress.

Session Three: The Significance of Peer Facilitator Training Why trauma-informed peer facilitator training is significant for both them and the women who become part of their groups, assessing readiness to facilitate partner groups, and identifying goals and action steps post training.

Session Four: The Peer Facilitator’s Self-awareness Unpacks self-awareness, its importance and significance in effectively fulfilling the peer facilitator role, and practices leading to increased self-awareness.

Session Five: Peer Facilitator Role and Principles How effectively fulfilling the peer facilitator role can help meet the partner’s complex needs within the small group experience, and the connection between peer facilitator principles and effectively fulfilling the role's

Session Six: Moving Toward Mastering Facilitator Skills Identifying essential facilitator skills, and why continually moving toward mastering them leads to creating and maintaining safe group experiences.

Session Seven: Navigating Group Dynamics and Stages Unpacks potential group dynamics and stages, needs of and possible partner’s behaviors during each stage, and appropriate/effective peer facilitator assessments, actions, and responses.effective peer facilitator responses.

Session Eight: Creating a Group Structure How strategic planning leads to creating a group structure model that increases safety for members while participating in peer facilitator-led groups – whether face-to-face within their local church or community, online or phone.

Session Nine: Confidentiality, Legal Obligations to Report and Referrals Recognize and identify importance and value of creating and communicating policies, practices, and procedures related to confidentiality, legal obligations to report and when/how to refer to a clinician and/or certified life coach or other appropriate professional services.

Session Ten: Crisis Theory Identify different types of crises, the connection between crisis and trauma, and steps leading to successful crisis resolution.

Session Eleven : Putting it all together!  An overview of the APSATS Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model (MPTM), effective facilitator practices during emotionally-charged group experiences, understand vicarious trauma, how to recognize its symptoms and integrate a self-care plan, and revisit and adapt initial goals/action steps.

A shift in perspectives

Creating a group culture where those who experienced betrayal trauma are more likely to move forward requires becoming trauma-informed. In doing so, we shift our perspective from "What's wrong with her" to "What happened to her, what's her story?"


In her book, Trauma+Grace, Theology in A Ruptured World, Serene Jones shares her introduction into understanding trauma through her relationship with a new church member. Take a few minutes to watch the video where Esther, an ADOH community member and experienced coach, presents the introduction.

As you watch the video, notice what you are feeling. 

Who do you identify with most

(Leah - or the author?) Why?

Creating a safe group culture where partners can move forward in their healing journeys is complex, requiring facilitators to balance the needs of individuals and the group as a whole. Using a variety of approaches, the interactive sessions build an awareness of the scope and responsibilities of the facilitator role, while experiencing a felt sense of "Yes, this is what a safe partner's group feels like!"

Taking that first step - let's connect!

During a pre-training phone or Zoom conversation, applicants learn why ADOH alumni describe the training experience as intense!

Your training experience will require completing all ADOH workbook exercises, actively engaging during the experiential live training sessions, and interacting in a temporary private training Facebook group.


Our conversations will provide an opportunity for you to understand the training experience and whether it's the right season to invest the emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical time in moving forward.

After completing the steps above and approved to begin your training experience, WHEN registration for a training cohort opens, you may make your $250 payment via PayPal by clicking the button below or via Venmo by emailing me for details.

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ADOH training schedule

ADOH training is offered throughout the year via weekly, two-hour Zoom sessions (Daytime 11 am to 1 pm or evenings 6:30 – 8:30 pm US CT) The training cost is $250 per person, and includes the training workbook, coach-led training, support throughout the training experience, and the opportunity to join the private ADOH alumni Facebook group.


In person "intensive" trainings are available through collaborations with churches, ministries, or organizations. Using three or four-day (22 hours) events, students meet the the same requirements of completing the ADOH workbook, participating in all sessions, and the private, temporary Facebook group.

ADOH Peer Facilitator Certification

Completing ADOH's peer facilitator training does not automatically lead to certification.  Meeting peer facilitator training standards requires a post-training experience that captures the trainees’ competencies in applying peer facilitator skills during a group experience. How that competency is captured is complicated and varies based on the trainees’ licensure or certifications (for example, clinicians, APSATS coaches) or extensive betrayed partner group facilitator experience that can be observed by others).

C-SASI (Christian Sex Addiction Specialists International) are long-time leaders in the sex addiction and partner trauma education fields.

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